Dating

Holiday fling or travel thing? How to hook up safely when you’re overseas

by Katherine

You have booked the flights, packed your suitcase, triple-checked your passport, and made a mental note to leave space for duty-free snacks. But what if you are also hoping to bring home something other than souvenirs?

Hooking up while you're overseas can be exciting, liberating and, let's be honest, pretty darn hot. You're away from your usual routine, meeting new people, and maybe feeling braver than you do at home. There's something about being away from home that can make you feel like a whole different person, ready to do stuff you might never consider in your regular life. Bunjy jumping? Skinny-dipping? Sure, why not?

The change of scenery can make even a casual flirtation feel more charged, and the possibility of never seeing each other again can add its own kind of magic. Still, when you know this is probably going to be a one-time thing, it is worth thinking about how to keep it fun while staying safe.

Know the vibe before you make a move

First, remember: Every country has its own laws, attitudes, and cultural norms around dating, sex, and LGBTQIA+ relationships. In some destinations, premarital sex can be illegal, and in others, same-sex relationships are criminalised. A quick check of reputable travel advisories or LGBTQIA+ travel resources before you go can save you from situations that are not just awkward but potentially dangerous. Being aware of the local culture and legal climate means you can focus on finding the fun in ways that keep you safe.

Pack your sense of safety

Even when you are away, your safety sense should come with you. The same rules you use at home still apply when you're overseas, maybe even more so. Meet somewhere public for your first hangout so you can get a sense of whether you click. Don't tell potential dates where you're staying. Let a friend back home or in your travel group know where you are going, and share your location if possible. And if something feels off, you do not owe anyone an explanation for leaving. Trusting your instincts is one of the best safety tools you have.

Make sure you're on the same page

If there's a language barrier, add extra clarity to your conversations. Flirty banter is great, but it is important to be sure you both understand what is being said, especially when it comes to consent and boundaries. Misunderstandings can happen easily when you don't share a language fluently, so slow things down and check in with each other before moving forward.

Safe sex everywhere, every time

When it comes to safer sex, do not assume your destination will have the products you like or that they will be easy to find. Condoms, lube, or dental dams might not be stocked in every pharmacy or corner store. Bring what you need from home so you aren't left scrambling when the mood strikes. A small, discreet "safe sex kit" in your luggage or day bag can save the night.

Your personal security matters, too

If you're using dating apps, take advantage of privacy features like hiding your exact location or limiting who can see your profile. This is especially important for LGBTQIA+ travelers in countries where being openly queer could put you at risk. Keep your passport, wallet, and phone secure, and never leave valuables in someone else’s space. Even if the connection is sizzling, do not compromise your ability to get back to your accommodation safely. Speaking of accommodation, don't bring people back to yours unless you're certain it's safe - again, as a general rule, just don't tell anyone where you're staying, and don't meet them at your hotel or hostel.

Then there's the emotional side

One of the best things about a holiday hookup is that it can be fun without being forever, but feelings can still surprise you. Be clear with yourself about what you want from the experience. If you would like to stay in touch, swap contact details or social media follows before you part ways. If you don't want to see them again, a polite goodbye is all that's needed. Either way, the choice is yours.

Remember, your story about hooking up while you're away from home is yours to keep or share however you like. Whether it becomes something you laugh about over cocktails with friends or a private memory you keep to yourself, it is yours to own. The best overseas flings leave you with more than just a sunburn and a few photos in your phone album. They give you a story, an experience, and maybe even a new way of looking at yourself.

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